A Drifter Finds Home
Five years ago, I led my family away from God's will. I was going through a crisis of belief--not knowing who I was or what I was supposed to be doing--and I took us down a road we should not have taken. Not a day went by over our five year journey that I didn't struggle with regret over the decision to leave our church and friends in Des Moines, Iowa in search of something only God could satisfy.
But God is gracious and good. Through the tragic death of my friend Jamie Walker (see blog entry for October 3, 2006) I was able to return to our church and friends in Iowa for the first time since we left on February 27, 2001. While in Des Moines for the funeral, I reconnected with some very special friends. I shared my regret and found forgiveness and understanding. I also found peace from God.
Many don't get the chance to "click their heels" and go back home. Instead they have to deal with the regrets of wrong turns made in the past as they continue through the desert. Getting to go back was, as one friend said, "like a miracle." Unfortunately, the circumstances surrounding my return related to the funeral of my friend.
Another friend related my last five years to a "wilderness experience" (like the 40 years of wandering by the Israelites in the books of Numbers and Deuteronomy). The peace I now have about who I am and what I am to do by faith in the future is much like finally being restored and being allowed to enter the "Promised Land." My response to my friend was that I wished I had gained this peace not from wandering in the desert but from the security of faithful obedience and patiently waiting on the Lord five years ago.
I have learned (and am learning) to wait in the silence of the Lord, as loud as that silence might seem, and not to move unless the Lord definitely leads me.
It may seem like "over the rainbow" is where you ought to go to find what you are looking for. But most likely, God has already blessed you with everything your heart desires in your own backyard. Be careful not to get sucked up in a cyclone of confusion because all you'll find yourself wanting is to get back home.
There's a saying, "Home is where the heart is." If you give your heart to God, in a relationship with Him through His Son Jesus Christ and empowered by His Holy Spirit, you will always be home. He promises to be with us always (Deuteronomy 31:6; Isaiah 41:10-13; Matthew 28:20). Therefore, if your heart is with God, and He is with you always, look to Him and Him alone for feelings of home, for "there's no place like home."
As I was writing this blog entry, I heard the following song playing in the background through the streaming audio of one of my favorite Christian radio stations: KZZQ. The timing of the words could not have been more perfect. Thanks God!
"Drifter" by DecembeRadio
I used to have a home
a place i started from
a place to call my own
bright lights and late nights
the devil took me on a midnight ride
left me out in the desert on my own
Now I feel alone
i need a hand to help me find my way back home
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
sometimes i think about the past
the road that i was on
the one that lead me home
i'll walk on another day
i may wonder but i never stray
cause i found out the hard way sin don't pay
Now I feel alone
i need a hand to help me find my way back home
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord
i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
and when i feel the night is closing in
and i can barely breathe the air
i just remember that i've got a friend who really cares
oh who really cares
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord
i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
But God is gracious and good. Through the tragic death of my friend Jamie Walker (see blog entry for October 3, 2006) I was able to return to our church and friends in Iowa for the first time since we left on February 27, 2001. While in Des Moines for the funeral, I reconnected with some very special friends. I shared my regret and found forgiveness and understanding. I also found peace from God.
Many don't get the chance to "click their heels" and go back home. Instead they have to deal with the regrets of wrong turns made in the past as they continue through the desert. Getting to go back was, as one friend said, "like a miracle." Unfortunately, the circumstances surrounding my return related to the funeral of my friend.
Another friend related my last five years to a "wilderness experience" (like the 40 years of wandering by the Israelites in the books of Numbers and Deuteronomy). The peace I now have about who I am and what I am to do by faith in the future is much like finally being restored and being allowed to enter the "Promised Land." My response to my friend was that I wished I had gained this peace not from wandering in the desert but from the security of faithful obedience and patiently waiting on the Lord five years ago.
I have learned (and am learning) to wait in the silence of the Lord, as loud as that silence might seem, and not to move unless the Lord definitely leads me.
It may seem like "over the rainbow" is where you ought to go to find what you are looking for. But most likely, God has already blessed you with everything your heart desires in your own backyard. Be careful not to get sucked up in a cyclone of confusion because all you'll find yourself wanting is to get back home.
There's a saying, "Home is where the heart is." If you give your heart to God, in a relationship with Him through His Son Jesus Christ and empowered by His Holy Spirit, you will always be home. He promises to be with us always (Deuteronomy 31:6; Isaiah 41:10-13; Matthew 28:20). Therefore, if your heart is with God, and He is with you always, look to Him and Him alone for feelings of home, for "there's no place like home."
As I was writing this blog entry, I heard the following song playing in the background through the streaming audio of one of my favorite Christian radio stations: KZZQ. The timing of the words could not have been more perfect. Thanks God!
"Drifter" by DecembeRadio
I used to have a home
a place i started from
a place to call my own
bright lights and late nights
the devil took me on a midnight ride
left me out in the desert on my own
Now I feel alone
i need a hand to help me find my way back home
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
sometimes i think about the past
the road that i was on
the one that lead me home
i'll walk on another day
i may wonder but i never stray
cause i found out the hard way sin don't pay
Now I feel alone
i need a hand to help me find my way back home
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord
i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
and when i feel the night is closing in
and i can barely breathe the air
i just remember that i've got a friend who really cares
oh who really cares
I'm a drifter out on a dead end road
trying to find my way back home to get to you
oh to get to you lord
i've been gone for far too long
headed to places i don't belong
and i've got to get back home to you
posted by Sojourner at 11:27 AM
2 Comments:
"Toto, I don't think we're in Iowa anymore!" Annointed entry, even if I do say so myself.
Perfect words for me to hear for my journey. I feel I have lost my way only because I took my focus off of GOD, but I am on the right track again. Thank you so much for having the courage to post.
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